Online Dating Likes and Dislikes: The
voices of the people. |
Like
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Dislike
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In my (limited) experience, the bar dating
scene is very formulaic and based mainly on outer appearances and
pre-approved small-talk topics. With
Match.com, I could spend some time writing out a "mission
statement," throw in some humor-which comes across completely
differently when read as opposed to being spoken-and get some 'good' photos on there.
If the ladies
don't like what they see, at least I don't have to spend $50 on
cocktails to find that out at the end of the night.
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I feel that online dating is geared more for women than men. I
only say that because after talking to some of my female friends, I
hear that they get an average of ten to 30 hits (winks, emails) a week
compared to my two or so every month or two...It's almost like shoe
shopping.
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I'd rather pay the 30-something bucks a month.
It beats spending the money on liquid courage at the bars. Besides, at
least on Match I don't run the risk of going home with someone I will
regret in the morning. "Don't say a prayer for me now, save it 'til the morning after."
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Be honest if you are looking for 'love'-sheesh.
I have met people who forgot to mention they were on the rebound. Hey,
that is what we can do...create a rebound website! YES!
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I like that fact that online dating gives shy people a
chance at meeting other people they would never have met otherwise.
Not everyone can easily go up to a stranger and just start talking,
but an online "wink" is easy.
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It sucks when they [men] look at my profile and don't
wink back. It's a small blow to the self-esteem. That's why I
think Match needs a middle finger button for those occasions.
Sometimes I'm tempted to write, 'What? You don't want this?'
but I chicken out.
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The
funny thing was, after I started going out on dates, I got to meet all
of their friends, which potentially exposed me to other dating
possibilities once I got past that initial hurdle of meeting and going
out with the fairer sex. It opened a lot of doors dating-wise. |
[Online dating] feels totally artificial and contrived.
Women can easily weed me out, without spending any time to know who I
really am, apart from my looks. That and people use photos that are
five years, 40 pounds, and two haircuts out of date.
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Two major features I like about Match are the 'delete'
and 'block' buttons. Too bad they don't offer those in bars.
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I didn't like cruising the men's profiles. Perhaps that is passive, but I wanted someone to actually seek me out
after reading my kooky profile, not just wink at me after I found him.
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I liked that you were on an even playing field,
and you knew the other person was also 'looking.' Otherwise,
you find yourself attracted to people who are involved.
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What I didn't like were hundreds of emails and winks from
total losers.
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Despite some really bad experiences-broken heart from
un-returned love, failed engagement-I have no regrets. I feel I have
grown by being exposed to such a diverse set of individuals through
online dating. One date may talk about Botticelli, while the next
prefers discussing how an engine works. And through all of them, I
have found new interests such as travel, art, literature, and more.
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Overall, my experience has been
in between--I've never met The One or even any reasonable candidates
for The One. I have met a couple of playmates and one
really good friend. I have also met some girls who were
supremely ill suited for me. I have met one (now) good friend
but overall the time and money were wasted as far as getting me back
to the married life.
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Some of the best relationships occur with people who are
just friends and then that sparks something special. I went for a
girl (my wife now) whose didn't even post a picture, her values,
likes/dislikes, and goals intrigued me, and this worked out really
well for me.
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Online dating in your late thirties for females is like
entering the dating Bermuda Triangle. This last eight months has not
been a good experience. At my age, I'm only being "browsed" by
much older men. Men my age seem to look for women in their early
thirties...Thus I have given up on online dating for a while.
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