Team One - Regenstein Library

How much is inside the Reg? This vast building is known and feared as the repository of U of C students’ souls, which it sucks out of their bodies upon their entrance. Some also call it a “library” or even “the Regenstein Library.”

Dan and I ventured into its depths on Friday in an effort to figure out just how many souls are inside the Reg. Don’t let the green appearance fool you; the Reg is a dark place. Its architect, Walter Netsch, built it in the “Brutalist” style for a reason. The Reg opened in 1970, which means that 35 graduating undergraduate classes have passed through its doors. Many of these met unfortunate and untimely ends, like the student said to have hanged himself in the 5th floor bathroom. We visited this very scary place, which is only slightly creepier than the rest of the building.

With a current undergraduate population of 4,762, and a turn-over of 4 years for said population, we calculated that 41,667 students have had the opportunity to visit the Reg in their time here, and whiled away their time in swastika-shaped cubicles. Taking into account the contradictory facts that the undergraduate population has grown over the decades, but that U of C students have grown progressively less geeky and more hot (an arguable statement, but I digress), we decided that this inflation rate really didn’t matter. However, there are a rare number of students—perhaps as much as ten percent of each graduating class—who have never set foot in the Reg, and thus retain their own souls. This would mean that the Reg must hold a huge number of souls—approximately 37,500—ostensibly trapped in tiny crevices between books in the stacks. Dan, understandably, is terrified.