I've never been keen on Safeway keeping track of my purchases, however. I've seen the fun information you can pull from a database.. no thanks.

It's bad enough facing the cashier with my cart full of vodka and fish sticks. Will someone someday realize that I only buy ice cream after midnight? If I buy condoms one month, and a pregnancy test the next, does some kind of red flag get raised?

With these concerns in mind, I've made a habit of these simple steps to help keep my grocery-shopping anonymous: 1)  I sign up with an alias and 2) I swap cards regularly with friends.

Now I want to try something different. I want to take the credit for all of my shopping, and for your shopping too!

The key to this plan is the UPC on the back of the card.

Typically when I use my Safeway card, the cashier swipes the card over his scanner. With a BEEP my card number is recorded, my savings deducted.

In November I registered a new card with my real name and address. Then I carefully photographed my card and printed the UPC onto a sheet of address labels.

If you shop at Safeway, I need your assistance in creating an army... an army of clones.

When you get the label in the mail, stick it on the back of your own Safeway Club Card, carefully covering the old zebra stripes.

Your old Safeway Club identity will be gone forever, just like in that movie Eraser, with Arnold Schwarzenegger.. unless you swipe your card through the magnetic reader.

Anyone who does this will be lumping their shopping data together with mine. Together we might amass a profile of the single greatest shopper in the history of mankind.

You will still get club card savings, but you will miss out on the odd promotions they have from time to time. Actually, some promotions are awarded at the register, so you may continue to benefit from those, although the rewards will be utterly unpredictable.

I could become (at least in the Safeway database) the Ultimate Shopper!

In return I promise to post photos of anything we earn related to the Safeway Club:  5% discount coupons,  free turkey certificates, jewel-encrusted scepters, etc.

I've tried the sticker on a second card of mine. It is hardly noticeable and works like a charm!

Sorry, this offer not available outside of North America.  

No. I didn't put a phone number on the card. That would have been a good idea Chris.

Update: 

All is going well. I've learned to check "my" Safeway purchases online and all kinds of funny stuff is showing up. Here are two screenshots of the pet items and liquor on the card. I'm not getting fat on frequent flier miles, by the way. That offer ends next week.

Another Update:

Another guy named Rob has a label swap working for a large supermarket chain in the Baltimore/D.C. area: Giant Bonus Cards

Also, it appears frequent flier miles are continuing to accrue. This was not the purpose of this project.