Reader Appreciation Week


 January 15th-22nd was Cockeyed Reader Appreciation / Email Showoff week.  It was a self-serving attempt to display the amazing bouquet of feedback I get at I said I would display or recognize every email I got in that week, and asked for no giant attachments. There was a great response.

The biggest attachment I got was from Sid the Kid (567K). Next time I'll be more specific about what "giant" is. 

I got 332 real emails and 226 spam emails in those eight days, 16 from (the W32/Sobig@MM virus), 13 advertising Norton Anti-Virus, and four Nigerian Banking scams.

 Spam subjects, spam senders

Page 1, 2, 3, 4  
Wednesday, January 15, 2003  
cliodhna grummell

cliodhna grummell
Heya Rob,

When i show the goyles your site, this is the reaction i get! Its no wonder 
you are!

Your Best Friend

Sailor Nick

This guy is nearly as bonkers as you ;)



This email confirms that you have received an Auction Instant Purchase Payment for $1.20 from Maudie H.  
Likeable by who?

stop making up stories. The man does not represent the
world. His mandate is set and controlled by the US and
you and him know it.

why does Peru or Argentina or Austria not consult with
him about how he will conduct a UN assigned inspection.

I hate to think of what he does with the US in secret.


On Tue, 14 Jan 2003, Rob Cockerham wrote:

> Hmm, maybe you are right!
> I always figured he was legitimate because he is so
> likable!

> -Rob

> -----Original Message-----
> From: dave 
> Sent: Tuesday, January 14, 2003 8:48 AM
> To: rob
> Subject: Han blix: Well documented CIA SPY!

> Dear ignorant and daft fool,

> You should be ashamed of yourself for getting involved
> with a man that is no more than a mere stooge, pigeon
> and spy for the US. 

> Unless you are one yourself you will see that Blix
> represents only himself and the US here. There are no
> indications that this deceitful man represents the UN.

> Shame on you. I hope the oil is worth it to you, Blix
> and the US.

> May your conscience continue to prick you till your
> last days on earth.
I think your idea is great and want to participate. Please sign me up. I teach fourth grade.

Cindy Blanton

I've included a picture of my cute and non-evil dog named Bailey. He's
> such a perfect little angel, as I'm sure you can see from the photo.
> Well, anyway, I just wanted to let you know how much of a fan he is of
> your site. His favorite section so far has been your Dropping Toast
> feature, especially because we tried it out on a smaller scale...and he
> got to eat a lot of toast. I also collected data with him one day. I sat
> there with a pencil and tallied the number of baskets he was able to shoot
> on the basketball court. What we found out was that collecting data is
> not that much fun, but maybe that was just because I didn't do any
> tallying.
> We've enjoyed so many other aspects of your site, and unfortunately I have very little time.
> And I'm sure my dog isn't the only one that enjoys your website. I'm sure
> if you poll the general viewing audience, maybe even .5 percent will be
> dogs...try it out. Maybe even some cats, who knows.
> Keep the good stuff coming, for the sake of all the dogs in the world.
> Thanks.

> Jeremy
The Trolls are slowly making their way through Arizona...Mainly because they have short legs


Remembering Northridge


I could not be happier with the content on your site. This is what the internet was built for, well actually the internet was built so the Military could communicate with each other more efficiently, but that's another story.



The theme here is protesters on the metro in DC.

The first is obviously a anti war statement about iRaq.

The second is a man in DC who says he was molested at the age of 12 in

a church in Italy. He protests on the Metro and in front of the

catholic embassy.




        What's that all about?!?!?
In any event, I love your site and thought I would send something to be posted...  
If you need an east coast "agent"  -  I know I could contribute somehow!!!  -  I'm always armed with my camera and ready for any kind of hijinx!!!  -  As an homage to your sign pranks, I have done similar here at my office...  

-Jesse S.

Two image attachments for your email showoff week:

1. Strawberries attempting suicide on the train tracks

2. Seattle's summer rain substitute




Just saying 'Whazzup' to get my name on your website, along with this

photochop that I did for my employer several months back that other pricks

have decided to start taking credit for (which is why I added the copyright

tag to it...)

May you find yourself surrounded by beautiful women!



Hi, I was curious as to where you found your information on Mr. Blix and his Rally Racing.  I'm trying to do a report and would love to know your sources.  Thanks.

Audrey That is a funny site that a friend
and I put up. That was just for you. Now that that is out of the way, love
the site. Do you still want teachers even though it is past the date?


you should do a contest for the person that emails you the most!


If you have the ahuacatl's to post THIS, you are the MAN!
Thanks for all the laughs, your website is the only one I feel is worthy to check every day.
Lee B.
They that can give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty or safety.
--Benjamin Franklin

photo edited

Dear Rob
This was definitely quite an insightful site. I had just spoken to my 
sponsor and given her my credit card number for the now $299 
International Business Packet when I decided to do some searching. 
Again, thank god for Google. I feel almost sorry for my sponsor, 
knowing now how much she must have invested in this scheme. I had also 
read the Lawsuit that was filed in my native Arizona in 1998 against 
Herbalife. In my $39 information packet, I had gotten acquainted with 
the names of John & Susan Peterson. After today, I feel compelled to 
write them and and let them know how having a set of morals to live by 
goes a long way. I doubt they can purchase that off the internet with 
as much money as they have. Thank you for letting me see, once again, 
that there is no easy way to make money.

Kudos to you.

Edna W.
What do you mean "no giant attachments" ?!?

Christopher D. Loental

Thursday, January 16, 2003  
Hi Rob,

Your email showoff week is just the excuse I needed to drop you a few lines of reader appreciation....

I'm one of your german fans. Been following the "How much is inside" series for years now. Simply hilarious... as are the science projects (I'm a physicist - I LOVE science :-) and the other stuff. You must really be wearing down that digital camera. So I'm sending you a photo too. But not one of my ugly mug. No, one of my guitar - since I'm a musician too...

Keep on the great work. You got fans around the world....


PS. I thought the Superinspector site was absolutely great!

Tammo Trueper

my music on the internet:

my german website:

my english website:


Thanks for the quick response. I saw on your website that it was last updated in 2000! I wasn't sure what to expect. I'm glad your still around.

The moon will be hanging in a gymnasium. I agree that a stand wouldn't be as cool. I'm concerned with the fact that the moon will turn constantly. I would have to set something against it on the floor to control that. Hanging from the ceiling won't be too hard with the scissor-lift the school has.

And, no one will be sitting or riding the moon (it's a Catholic school...)

I'm having a "Decorating Committee" mtg. tomorrow. I'll let you know how things go.
Thanks a mill for the advice.

Hi Rob,

Discovered your site today. Checked out a bit. I look forward
to exploring it further. I liked the What's Inside area.

I also reviewed the Why visit Sacramento area and it made me
want to check out some of the coffee places and restaurants that
were mentioned.

My wife and I currently live in West Hollywood and we are planning
on moving to Sac the first half of this year. I went to UCD (86)
and I know Sac a bit. 

I have a couple of questions. We currently live in an area full
of restaurants, theatres, etc and we like to walk to these places.
It is also a fairly safe neighborhood with a diverse community.
Is there anywhere in Sacramento that would compare? We are looking
for an area that would have single family homes and apartments,
good food and coffee and a diverse demographic. 

I would appreciate any advice that you are willing to share.

Jeff B
i think i may have a teacher for you for Pennsylvania in the postcard exchange

i think i can let you know tomorrow

Jay G.

Dear Rob,

How much is inside of a hillbilly?

I want to know!

it was where the pool guy went to the movies and met Jerry there and
Jerry basically blew him off and then in the end the guy got his job back
at the health club and between Jerry and Newman, they almost drowned the
poor dude.... Kramer had his ph# almost the same as the movie phone # 
in the episode too and he would pretend to be the movie phone.... don't
know the name of the episode...

that's the best I can do...

Michelle T.

Hey Rob, love the site. I must know more about Tara,

the adorable pumpkin girl. She could scoop my seeds anytime!

Hey Rob... as a follow up piece to your toast dropping story, check out

Jeff K.
i used to rest my feet on my computer case but i aint doin that shit anymore.
Check out the attachment.

p.s.Don't worry, it's made of chocolate cheesecake (with rasberries).

Joe H.
Rob, Rob, Rob,

Can you send me some photos of the mini cow field trip day at Erica's house? 

One showing his stature and bulk would be especially nice, or one with the dog.  Or one with him headbutting.

Actually, any will do.

How are ya?


hi there,

dunno if youve tried sending any emails to schools but i thought id have a 
quick go see how effective it is, i sent a few brief emails to schools in 
Alabama Alaska Arizona and Arkansas outlining the idea and linking them to 
your site, id love to know if any of them get back to you and if they do i 
think it would be worth doing this for all the unsigned up states.


p.s. wahoo reader appreciation week!
Hello Rob, I am Jamie R., a teacher in Colorado. I teach first graders
and second graders (next year). I am interested in doing the postcard
exchange unless you think it really is geared to 3rd grade or higher. My
students are learning to write and could benefit from an authentic writing
experience. Thanks.
Let me know what I should do next.

Jamie R.

Thank you for making me smile today. I really love the titles you've given the California Quarter designs.
Good Job. 

I did vote for the Hula State.

Paula B.
Burning up inside, nip pin the tale on the done key, father father, let me in, it's cold out here, uncouth, cun thou, and how. Disturbing distressing dressed down naked. Goes flesh, pimp hell, worlds oldest confession, I've heard that one before. Stolen, folden, mirror rim roar eavesdrop picklock, see zero see eye keyed

come robber, thief in the night, bud beg do egg, roof and aught spring. Banging on a typewriter, ripe tighter, mortal coil court all moil, I only take tips.

James P.
Just wanted to put props up for MAPLEWOOD!!!!
your site is great.
Frank H.
I enjoyed your "work at home" (Herbalife) report thoroughly. Thank-you. Now I understand all these signs that are popping up in my area. Hard to believe they are mostly from one company.

Mark W.

I like Rob most because he's honest.  He's a man of his word.  He promised that he would display every e-mail he got, so I'm sure that he'll display this one, even though I'm using it as shameless advertising for my site,
Thanks, Rob!
Mike B.
for your gallery
my grandma gave me her 1969 pontiac grand prix for easter last year!
Duane T.

Dear Rob at,
Tragically, the increase of missing persons is now
more rapid than ever. Most of the people have been
missing for a decade or so and have family who refuse
to admit that their child was raped and then cut into
tiny pieces and eaten. But some cases are still "ligit"
and the poor person has been robbed of their home and
life. And on the 19th of November (2002) I became one
of them too. It all began one night while I was
cautiously talking in "Mothers online" chat rooms. I
was complaining, like usual, about the lack of business
ethics in today's society. You may ask yourself, why
was she talking to mothers about this? Well they seem
to be the only ones with a sympathetic ear. Everyone
else labeled me as a paranoid conspiracy theorist and
would leave the room when I entered. I ask you though,
is it not a patriotic and noble thing to question
Corporate America's dirty deeds? 
But back to my disappearance. As I was talking to
these empathetic women, I got a telepathic message from
my cat that there was a black Ford Excursion with
tinted windows parking in my neighbors reserved spot. I
knew that my neighbor would bring it up at the next
board meeting, so I walked out, bunny slippers and all,
to tell the driver that they would have to move. As I
approached the car the passenger side door opened.
Thinking that I must be having that
mysterious-hot-pizza-guy dream again, I got in.
Four days later I woke up to the sound of my
neighbor yelling at me to get my butt out of his
reserved parking space. What happened between my
disappearance and that day I do not know. I did find
the enclosed picture of me in my pocket. The only
change in me, besides my lapse in memory, is a strong
desire to eat cat. Which is why I gave my cat away to
the daughter of a Mother Online who lives in Nebraska.
I have not gone to the police for fear of being mocked.
I am sure its not aliens because (1) I do not have any
unusual marks on my body and (2) what aliens have you
seen driving Excursions? 
I was writing you in hopes that maybe you or one
of your readers may have seen me sometime between
November 19th and 22nd, or have had a similar
Thank you for your time,
Yeah. yeah.

You may not remember me as one of the many wagging tongues once and possibly future lodged up your... er.... In case you haven't gotten the message in the past, you are wonderful.

I enjoyed the piece you posted on the homeless artist, but I think perhaps 
you missed a crucial element... I think it would do you good to seek this 
guy out and talk to him for yourself. It would make him a little more real. 
There is someone I tend to equate to this sort of homeless guerilla artist 
who comes into my work here in Los Angeles. He comes in almost everyday to Borders Books Music and Cafe with pockets full of deposit slips which he writes on and leaves in random books and magazines. There have been a number of confrontations between the man and the staff, but he continues to come and leave his notes, which are mostly just numbers and brief mentions of concerns about the government. Everytime he comes into the cafe, I am filled with a sense of worry and awe and other such curious feelings. It is one thing to find what he is leaving around, and it is quite another to come in direct contact with the artist himself.

Anyhow, I dunno. It just makes things seem... More confronting and perhaps even disturbing when you see the actual art.

I don't know why, but I'm scared of muttering homeless.

And I still love your work.


"'Caution caution caution to prevent electric shock, do not do not do not 
remove cover. No user serviceable parts inside, refer servicing to qualified 
service personnel.' Let this be the epitaph for my heart." -Magnetic Fields




Recognize every email huh? Well, what better chance to show off a picture of myself with the (now former) governor at the Maryland Environmental Legislative Summit 2002.

Picture from left to right:
Some other female politician I donít know
Jared Noe (wearing the hat)
Megan Germano (purple sweatshirt)
Former MD governor Paris Glendening (important-looking guy)
Myself, Christian Knipp (Virginia Tech sweatshirt, GO HOKIES!)

Of all the actually interesting things I couldíve submitted, oh well. :o)

Clone Army

Dave H.

hi there...
   My name is Jennifer, and I am a decently new herbalife distributor. I really disliked your article, and I do fully suggest you go and see Dr. Komadina about herbalife and the benefits it provides for many, including me.
   I read the article about the Fallows sueing Herbalife, and yes, there are definitely evil people in this world. Heck, just like there are really nice christians (for example, and no I am def. not christian), who go through life just wanting to be accepting of others, helpful and kind, there are the evil psychos that need something to follow and need something to create a very large empire of psychos.
   I've seen it in Herbalife so far, that there are quite a few people that aren't that great of people, that promise certain things that just don't happen every day.
   My upline supervisor, however, Tracy ________, is wonderful. Heck, the whole group is wonderful, we're actually out to help people. I was on five different medications for bipolar and have been off of them for five months due to the base products. There is one product that contains ephedra, and it's being phased out by a new one, "Total Control". 
   I recently attended a meeting by Dr Komadina, and although he was extremely pleasant, most of the people there were almost in a way...evil? I'm only 19, might I add, just on a random note.

   I'm sorry to hear that your town is plastered with the flyers. One town isn't big enough for two herbalifers LOL. HOwever, maybe you should stop concentrating on how horrible the business is and start concentrating on how wonderful the products are. I'm not talking about Thermojetics Gold with ephedra, I won't sell that. But the other products are so amazing, and with the alarming rate of obesity, it's for such a great cause. Try not to be so negative! a few bad people an entire group look horrific. I believe there are around 40 million independent distributors in the world, but I could be way way off.
   If you would like to contact me, contact me at __________. please don't give out my email. the only reason I wrote is because your article disheartened me, and I know what the products do for me...I just wish that you knew too.

have a great night, it's 2 in the morning here around boston.



So what prize do I get for emailing you?

I'm planning on going out to pizza and beer Friday night with Alvin. You are welcome to attend.

Ken Y.


Forward to Friday, January 17, 2003