Not a lot of money. A lot of time.

Craigslist was worse than useless for finding good mates.

.

OKCupid.com is a match service that is entirely free.

I joined Match.com just over a year ago, June or so.  On August 30, 2005 I went on a date with my
now girlfriend.  I didn't get to use the site much, but I did find someone I am incredibly
attracted to quickly.  I have told my single friends that its worth it, but some still balk at the
price.
I think the idea is a good one but if you live in a semi-rural area (like Maine) it doesn't work
quite as well. I came across as cheap at eharmony, but only because I didn't want to pay for like
two matches in the course of a year. And on an unrelated note, not that this would ever work, I
wish there were a one-service-at-a-time rule. It would be nice to be able to shift gears and look
in a different "area" as it were, but really I find that I just end up seeing the same profiles no
matter which site I'm at. Again this might have to do with the rural area thing. But still. There is one site I have used that is completely free and seems to be pretty good. 
www.plentyoffish.com  
Bad name but a good website.   D

I went on a few blind dates with grad students. Bad move. At one point, I saw an ad on Yahoo
personals for a guy who seemed nice but had awful pictures. Turns out he was a lot better in
person. Three years later, we're still snuggling. :)

My comments aren’t directly related to Internet dating sites but matchmaker services in general.

I’ve never been a social animal.  I don’t go to bars or clubs, don’t belong to a church or
other social organizations, and generally keep to myself.  I’d tried a few early Internet dating
sites and dabbled in the pre-Internet BBS dating scene without much success.

A little over ten years ago I joined a service called Perfect Match for around $1,000 if memory
serves.  I went through the whole interview and videotaping deal and became a profile in a binder
and a tape on a shelf.  Several months went by with no results, though the service assured me that
they were actively trying to match me with someone.

Six months after joining the service I had to relocate halfway across the country for a new job. 
Fortunately Perfect Match had a branch in the area I moved to, and my membership transferred. 
Again I went though the interview and videotaping fiasco, and figured I’d just be cataloged again
without much success, but that turned out not to be true.  Within a few weeks my phone was ringing,
and I had three dates lined up within a month of relocating.

The first two fit the profile I was looking for, but things didn’t go beyond the first date.  The
third was totally from left field.  Neither of us fit the profile we’d requested to be matched up
with, in fact in many ways we couldn’t have been more opposite.  I’d lost the job I had
relocated for the day before our first date, so things didn’t get off to the best start.  On the
second we both got sick from the meal we ate.  Every date seemed to have its associated disaster,
but there was something magical going on and we both knew it.

I’ve been with this woman for nearly ten years now, six as a happily married couple, and I’m
certain we will grow old together.

In my opinion whether you join a service like I did or join an Internet based service, don’t
worry about the costs and associated frustrations.  If you find that special someone any money
spent or frustrations you went through will be irrelevant and soon forgotten about.I got sick of outdated and inaccurate photos- women know how to take the picture of the right side
at the right angle to make you think they were half their size- I am not saying big is bad, but
it's deceitful- why start a relationship out on a lie?

I find that I see a lot of profiles of women that I am interested in and I wink at them.  However I
always receive a "Not Interested" reply back.  I don't quite understand this.  While I don't look
like Brad Pitt, I think I'm reasonably attractive and I don't think I have anything in profile that
makes me look bad.  I am tired of dating in general, tired of the rejection, and tired of being
lonely.

We got drunk and I passed out together. I woke up the next morning in a bathtub of ice. There was an
eight inch incision in my side and a strangely hollow feeling where my left kidney had been. -J
VanDyne
I'm the poster child for bad online experiences! I signed up with plentyoffish.com because its free
and I seem to have dated every single weirdo within 50 km. I'm not discouraged yet but the stories
are really hilarious. Everything from a guy with a foot fetish who wanted me to "stomp on the
accelerator with your foot and let me watch" (why? I don't know, we were actually sitting in my
parked car at the time) to someone who seriously believed that Nelly (yes, Country Grammar Nelly)
was giving him shout-outs in his songs, even though they had never met ("its possible we've been in
the same chat groups because I've been on the internet for several years and so has he. He uses my
nickname in his songs" he said. With a straight face. Oh my.). I've ducked and dodged attempted
kisses goodnight and given a hearty handshake. The most surprising thing about it is how many
people need a therapist and think that I could be that therapist. I've sat through incredibly
honest disclosure about very personal things which would be a touching testament to the willingness
of males to open up and actually talk except that THERE ARE SOME THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT DISCUSS ON
THE VERY FIRST DATE. Your raging coke habit, the stress a death caused your family, your ex-wife,
previous sexual problems, fights with your friends, how often you cry...A first date is an
INTRODUCTION. I like to think we're putting on our best face. Learning that you cry every day and
that you think you're depressed makes me think you're scary and damaged and I don't want that
baggage, thanks.

Its a weird world. I'm having fun but I really would just like to find my match. On the bright
side, I could always consider a career change and become a therapist.I have had zero success with any of the "cheap" services you mention. e-harmony said I wasn't
compatible with anyone, which was just a minor ego blow compared to the fact that, in just shy of 3
years of having a profile up on the Onion, Match, True, Nerve, and several others, I've gotten under
10 genuine emails or winks--several companies, most notably True.com, are kind enough to have
employees write you and flirt. They were also kind enough to add a "wink to everyone" button so
that there's no real way to know when someone has viewed you and was interested, or if you're just
randomly chosen. Another service I recently took my profile off of decided that the midwest is all
the same, and therefore returned matches from as far as Kentucky when I live in Michigan and am
looking for someone within 100 miles. Overall, the online "dating" thing, which for me has included
an average of one date every 17 months or so, (2 total dates since November 04) has been exceedingly
negative. One can follow every "get noticed" step, (write people often, be funny, be honest, include
a picture, etc.) and yet never get so much as acknowledgement of an email or a wink. At least in the
bar/in public, people generally tell you to go away.
Using Lavalife, I met a girl & dated for 12 months, met another girl shortly after and dated for 18
months, met another girl & had a wild time for a month or two (still friends now), met a fourth
girl two years ago and we are now engaged.  Thanks, Lavalife.
Hovercraft

i can send out a dozen e-mails to women and none of them respond.  it's about the same in real life,
though.  i've had a crappy last couple years.

I have no problem with my mail-order bride from Russia. She's quiet, keeps me happy, and when I'm
done I can put 
her back in the box in the closet.  And all for $20 dollars!  At first I thought the deal was too
good to be 
true, but when Serena Arichnovov showed up at my door I knew I had made a good buy.  Plus, if I
ever want to 
upgrade, I think Serena has a high resale value.I gave match.com a try for 3 months. I sent out dozens of emails, but never recieved a single reply.
I was contacted by ONE young woman who I emailed casually with for a few weeks. In total about 6
emails. I wanted to meet and never heard from her again. I tried eharmony for their free trial
period. After their extensive questionaire i waited about 3 weeks before i heard anything. After
the trial period expired i still get emails from them. So far all the leads that eharmony comes up
with are on the east coast, or are considerably older than I. Reading the descriptions of the women
I must say that i do find them to be a decent match, but because i don't subscribe i can't
comunicate with them. Plus i don't want a long distance relationship. I gave up on all of it. I
definately know that women get more out of it. A few i know, have more dates a week than possible.
if one goes bad they have another one to jump too. I guess women want men to come to them.
It's frustrating to spend 10 minutes or so writing an email to a woman and only have MAYBE 1 in 10
respond back.  Even a "thanks but no thanks" would be better than no response at all.  No response
just seems rude.
To be honest, I don't know if I count...I wound up hooking up with people on Internet Relay Chat
services, by becoming a regular on a channel where the topic was a common interest (usually a
spiecific band or artist). I actually fell in love once, and I REFUSE to call it anything other
than love. We were young and never had the cash to jump on a plane and meet, we went our separate
ways once people in our real lives started closing in on us.  To this day, I can't stop wondering
about him.

I met my wife through an online dating service.  I had about two years of dates ranging from good to
terrible before I found my match.  I agree with that the website forced me to constant re-evaluate
who I was and what I was looking for.  I ended up rewriting my profile after each person and the
result was a profile that was described me and my ideal match honestly and completely.  My wife had
similar experiences to mine and we are both very happy that we tried online dating.
Many people like to do the internet dating-thing, but oddly enough, people feel so much shame about
it. No one likes to admit that they met someone online. 
I tried them all (well, the ones for lesbos, at least) for 5 years, had a boatload of first dates, a
handful of second dates and zero relationships. 

Then I went to the bottom of the barrel, Craigslist, wrote an short and sweet and brutally honest
ad, describing me (the good and the bad), that I was open to meeting just about anybody but there
were some things I couldn't stand for (I don't do "open relationships" and don't like bondage) and
got one response. We've been dating for 2 years and are oddly well-matched (in the only way 2 very
strange people could be) and we're shacking up and it's great.

My advice to people doing the online dating thing is (1) have a sense of humor about it, (2) see as
many people as you can, (3) have a short list of "dealbreakers" (hey, if you want a monogamous
relationship, don't settle for someone who is polyamorous), (4) make sure your "dealbreakers"
aren't too specific (just because you always wanted to marry a doctor doesn't mean you're going to
find a doctor that's right for you) (5) if he/she fits within your parameters, but may "seem a
little boring," give them a shot. (some people don't express themselves well via e-mail but are
sparkling conversationalists. on the flip side, some people write e-mails remarkably well and can't
hold their end of a conversation), (6) MOST IMPORTANT, don't let it linger in e-mail purgatory. You
like him, he likes you? Great. Pick up a phone or make a date. There's nothing more disappointing
than writing e-mail novels and you never end up meeting (or worse, you finally meet and it's just
not what you expected).
Oh, look at this glorious text-wrapping! What a treat!
I'm currently on Match.com and Eharmony, been looking total about 6 months or so now. I only
recently got active on Match, but already I’ve found several interesting people. I like Match
because you can search by interests; it makes it easier to find what you are looking for. In
general I like online dating because it finds a way around in person jitters and is much more
appealing to me than the bar scene.

met my fiance :)Avoid the college crowd- if they've got all the social possibilites of school there must be
something wrong if they're having to get on Match.
I was on two sites, eHarmony and and Yahoo! Personals.  After my month membership with eHarmony
ended, I went on to try Yahoo! Personals.  I met someone through Yahoo Personals that lived over 2
hours away from me. We exchanged many stories, many emails, I visited a bunch of times, and now
almost 2 years after meeting, we've been married for 1 year!  We got to know each other so well
through open communication in the first stages, vs being thrown right into a 1st date.  We found
out own common interests, and the rest is history!

It's awfully hard to find an over 6 foot tall red headed flat chested hermaphrodite from Barbados
(ONLY!) willing to have sex with an unemployed sanitation engineer. For now, it's just me and Patty
Palm and her five friends...

Well, I also ended up marrying what I said was my last date on Match.Com. We just celebrated 1 year
and I love her to death!....Sid  Maryland

To me, online dating doesn't necessarally mean using one of these dating services. In my case it was
more like an electronic version of traditional dating methods. You go out to someplace social, in
this case a message board or chatroom discussing your interests, and you strike up conversations
with interesting people. It's how I met my current girlfriend.I didn't need it, and never will.  God forbid I should ever need to date again, but if that happens
you can bet I wouldn't be seeking dates online.  It just seems so... desperate.

I met my current girlfriend on OKCupid.com, a dating site created by the people behind the much
missed TheSpark.com. Unlike all the services here, it's free. It uses tests to figure out
compatibility, so it has at least the illusion of science behind it. The site doesn't take itself
too seriously, which is great. And it has some pretty mad web skillz behind it, too. I have to say
my experience has been very good overall. I'm very happy right not.
I've never used a dating site, but I met my husband on an online comedy forum.Crap. My ex-gf, who said she wanted to be single and didn't want to be with anyone, appeared in a
'Featured profiles' email a couple of months later, with a photo of herself that she got taken
'just for me'. Yay. Women are nasty and we should throw rocks at them.

I got married to someone I met through online dating.
Rotund housewives from NJ enjoy my profile.

This wasn't so much online dating, but it was a dating service, Great Expectations.  My friend
signed up for it, paid the expensive fees, and none of her choices responded to her.  She got a few
queries, none from anyone she liked.  Then I looked on craigslist, and found a listing that seemed
perfect for her.  She's since gone inactive at Great Expectations, paid off her contract, and is
seeing the craigslist guy exclusively.  Paid dating service: 0, free online personal ad: 1.Hey Rob,

I like Daina's write-up about online dating. In fact, it's how John (Badmouth.net boy) and I met.
We are successes of Match.com as well. This was over 5 years ago, but I don't recall having to pay
a membership fee. I think women could join for free. John swears that he had to pay to email me via
my profile. I figure that's fair, right?! I think their policies have probably changed over the
years. I can't say enough good things about online dating. It's quite possibly the best thing that
ever could have happened to me. 

Hope all is well with you and your family!
Take care,
Patti Marcotte

.
I just went to plentyoffish.com. Compared to just about every other dating website in existence --
even the other big free one, okcupid.com -- it skews DUMB. People cannot spell or put "words"
together to make "sentences." Plenty of fish bashing their brains against the tank glass.

I am living with a girl that i met online, but I didn't meet her on an online dating site.
I just have one point to make about online dating sites. Note that this applies to me of course;
other people might find something else working for them. Hopefully this isn't too long!

I've tried several dating sites when I was single (match.com, americansingles.com, etc.). The thing
I didn't like about all of them (except one; I'll get to that) was that you filled out countless
checkboxes and that was supposed to mean, well, the more checkboxes you had in common with someone
the more you'd hit it off, right? But I realized that even with a lot of "checkbox interests" in
common, 2 people might still be very different and have no interest in each other! Seems strange
perhaps, but that's how it was.

The only site I found working was hotornot.com, and that's because there, you put up a pic, and you
write your own little blurb and/or keywords. In other words, you have more freedom to just put what
you want, which I think gives a much better *sense of personality* than countless checkboxes. And
also it requires a pic, which helps so much.

Note that this was before friendster, hi5, myspace etc. came along. I think they're better than
"dating" sites also, for similar reasons as hotornot - I get a better sense of who the person IS,
because they're in control of what I see. Simple I guess. Also, if you go in hoping to make
friends, you won't get so disappointed. You have to have the right attitude when you meet someone,
no matter where or how, or the relationship won't even start.

-Milton
My experience with online dating was very positive.  After living in Georgia all my life, I went
into the Army and was stationed at Fort Huachuca, in southeast Arizona.  I was relatively young
(26), had a good career field (attorney), and was in good shape and not bad to look at.  But the
local town, Sierra Vista, is not big at all.  Also, as a "permanent party" officer, I was not
allowed to date any enlisted personnel or any of the military intelligence officers who were
students at the fort.  So I put free ads up on match.com and Yahoo! personals, with enough
information that someone could figure out how to get in touch with me for free.  I went from dating
no one to, at one point, going on three first dates in one week.  After a year of dating different
women, I ultimately met my future wife, and I proposed nine months later.  We've been married for
almost three years now, and even the stresses of moving to Germany and my yearlong deployment to
Kuwait, Afghanistan, and Iraq weren't enough to split us up.

c

Not so great.  It appears that alot of men write what you think you want to hear.  Additionally, I
had alot of hits from men who refused to read what my requirements were regarding age, ethnicity
and marital status!The shit is off the chainz, for real, yo!  I met mad many fly girls who was willin' to put out on
the reals.  Naturally, you gots to do up the real expensive chromey shit, but how could them
bitches resist it's just lunch when brother be ordering Veuve for all the table, and bein' like mad
flossy about Ma Dukes.  For reals.

i met my husband on my first try ;)
Having tried some services in teh last year I have to agree with the article on many points. It's
very much the womans marekt. Us guys rarey get winks or messages, but I've heard from many of my
dates that they get a lot of response without having to be very active.

I also agree strongly with the fact that pay-sites like Match feel a lot more serious than the free
versions, where a lot of people just seem to hang out to cause trouble and heartaches.

Well written and interesting, I enjoyed reading it.

I've dabbled in cheap-to-free dating sites, and never managed to meet a single person who sparked
any interest. While I did end up meeting my now-fiance online, it was not through a dating site,
and I seriously doubt the ability of any system to bring the two of us together. Probably because
neither of us knew what we were looking for until we found it.

More tattoos than I wanted...

I mostly met creepy and/or self-absorbed geeks. Only two led to more than one date, and those didn't
last too long. I kind of learned that anyone who's proud of being "arrogant" is not really someone I
want to be around. I even garnered a stalker from online dating!
I've have a 4 year relationship with someone I met online, and am currently in a one-year
relationship with someone I also met online. I would never have met them if it weren't for the
internet, and both have changed my life for the better.
I met three girls, all of whom were completely unsuited for me. One was literally mentally deranged,
one was overweight beyond comprehension (at least 500 lbs), and one had an incompatible personality
(party animal). I met my wife of five years the "traditional" way; I got up the courage and talked
to her and she didn't kick me in the nuts.
A lot of the women's profiles I came across had long lists of prerequisites before they would even
consider talking to you. They were looking for this ultimate guy who, most likely, isn't looking
for dates online - if he even exists at all. A lot of the women I ended up meeting were very
insecure.
So far, not good. :(  Need to work on my profile and what I'm looking for I suppose.  And get some
more recent and better pics.  I've lost 45lbs over last couple months and definitely shows. :)

When I was in my late 20's I tried an 'alternative' dating site. While as a female I might have
gotten more hits overall, that wasn't exactly a plus. Most of the hits I got were from people who
quite clearly had not read my profile at all past "female" and "26". Even those that had read the
profile couldn't string three words together without a mispelling, and the grammar was awful. This
may seem nitpicky, but to me that's the equivalent of showing up to a date smelly. I met my boyfriend of 2 years on OKCupid, a free networking/dating site.
I found that women don't generally respond to men's profiles, and the few that do aren't very
serious about meeting. The few dates I have gotten were from introduction services where someone
picks someone for you and then emails both of you with an introduction.

Yes, lots of creeps out there use online dating. But it is much easier to blow them off online
(don't respond & block them from sending you messages) than in person. I met my fiance online (OK
Cupid for those who care), and he's better than I could have asked for--it was nice because I could
see his intriguing little quirks online, that I probably would not have picked up on during a first
date (and we're both really shy, and never would have met otherwise)

what the hell is this? Rob, i'm confused. write a prolouge

My friend Daina wrote an article about dating services. I put it on Cockeyed.com. I hope you enjoyed
it. I, for one, was surprised that "it's just lunch" costs $1,500.

fags
Match is a strange world that really sucks you in.  I call it PG voyeurism; you get insight into the
lives of all these different people from the comfort of your own computer.  I do think it is biased
towards women, from talking to 40+ dates most girls sit back and wait for the E-mails/winks whereas
men have it a bit harder.  For men it’s a bit like fishing, trying to catch one fish at a time
will result in very little return, instead a “net” must be cast (E-mails sent to 10+ girls at a
time) and pulled in to see what you get.  Sometimes you’ll get nothing and have to recast the net,
other times the returns are overwhelming, it always seems like feast or famine.  The other thing
I’ve noticed is a lot of the people on Match are very flakey.  From this I mean some will strike
up conversations and then stop writing with no warning, same thing happens even after a few dates. 
People forget there are people attached to the pictures they’re looking at, and start trying to
“trade-up”, with little regard to the feelings of those they’re talking too.  I met my
current girlfriend on Match and wrote letters to the other girls I had been talking to and got a
very positive response, it appears I wasn’t the only one dropped without explanation in the past.
 All-in-all I think Match is a good vehicle to get you out there if you’re not good at striking up
conversations.  Personally once the ice is broken I’m not a shy guy but approaching a girl for the
first time is very stressful to me.  It can be pricey and frustrating as the article posted attested
to, but overall I’d spend more than $30 going out to bars in a single night let alone a whole
month.  Chris

I had a professor in college who made a good point advocating using an online dating service.  "What
is the biggest investment you make in your entire life?  It's not your house, or your car, or your
401(k).  It's your spouse.  The person with whom you spend the rest of your life and raise a
family.  Why would you leave this up to chance?  You would research buying a house or investing
your money...why wouldn't you research and narrow down your spouse?"
I went out with the first guy who asked me.  We've been together for two years.
I doubt this was intentional on your part, but most of the people you quoted from were women.  From
a man's point of view, let me offer this:  Online dating is a meat market where, despite what the
services claim, paying members (that's the key) seem overwhelmingly male.  Women get the veritable
pick of the litter (which, let's not kid ourselves, may not be much).  I've paid for several
different services and was unhappy with all of them. 
Hey Rob,

I'm from Canada, and I'm actually still in the process  currently.  I really have to agree,
overall, with everything that was presented here.  Being a 37 year old male, I found the comment
pertaining to the "Bermuda Triangle" of dating to be the most accurate.

A really great, free site out there is www.plentyof fish.com  They are based in Canada but have a
worldwide scope and a great and entertaining selection of dissusion boards (Forums, no not like in
Penthouse).

Love your site and this article.

Mike

It sucks.

I didn't meet my wife through an online dating site, but I used to use them.  I met the person that
introduced me to my wife via Match.com.  We've been married for more than a year and a half now.

For a long time it was excruciating hell. I seemed to be in a weird age bracket...all the women up
to my age wanted to stop at 29, and the only ones who seemed to want a man at 30 were ten years my
senior. I also had my own kooky interests and a somewhat unique religion-which isn't Christianity.
I stated that specifically and always seemed to get emails from devout jesus freaks who found me
interesting.
  I tried a lot of different sites, but generally only found 3-6 women I wanted to contact on each,
and because of the cost, usually WAITED until I had at least 10 possibles to join for a month. Out
of those, I usually got back one reply. I know some females get overwhelmed with horny males(at
least, all the ones I actually talked to did), but if you aren't interested, and it was a polite
email, could you at least hit the NOT INTERESTED reply button??!!!
  In the end I was very discouraged...some sites, Match included started not letting me even see
who it was who emailed or winked without suscribing first. That sucked, because it meant a choice
of laying out $30+ to see if it was a good match, or, on 2 occaisions, some dumb russian/Nigerian
spam scam....
   For those who wanted to know why men only winked back, perhaps it was that we had already spent
so much money, we wanted a decent chance of a match...if we didn;t see one really, well...I wasn't
going to lay out the cash for one wink.
  But, it is a happy ending with a lesson in perseverance.  After 2 years someone whose profile I
had passed over as...well, too boring...no real info at all, emailed me out of the blue with more
info. I rejoined, answered, we met that friday, spent the whole weekend together. That was 6 months
ago, now we live together and are well on the way to marriage. I've never been in a better
relationship. 
  So..keep trying....
I was on three dating sites, I found match.com the best, just because there are so many members.  I
got loads of winks and emails, and as a result I ended up talking to a lot of people!  I actually
found it a bit stressful trying to find some suitable people out of all the contacts I had, as well
as stressing about appearing impolite to those I didn't want to meet.  How do you really know who to
choose to go out with?  What if you choose one over the other, develop a relationship, and then find
yourself wondering if you'd have been better off with the ones you rejected?  I found this quite
hard, especially because the date you finally go on can be seen as quite serious as you'd already
been chatting for a while beforehand.  I found it very difficult to choose one over the other
without being left wondering.  However, I have made some friends, and had two relationships.  I'm
still in one of them, that's been four months.  There were a few frogs first!  Unfortunately, it's
not developing very well, so I think I may be back on online again in a few months.

I tried eHarmony for a month about a year ago. It was worthless. They make selections of
"compatible" people, so you have to wait for them to find people FOR you. And the "compatible"
people they gave me were anything but! I made it clear in my profile and personality test that I'm
career-minded and don't want kids, and half the guys they gave me as matches wanted their woman to
be a stay-at-home baby factory! Others were religious nutcases (including one who claimed never to
have read any book except for the Bible) even though I made it clear that I'm not religious, and
many were profiles of members who had apparently cancelled membership. Yes, they keep your profile
active for matchmaking after you cancel, but they don't tell the people they match you with
post-cancellation that you're no longer a member! Luckily, some people put warnings in their
profile before they cancel so you don't waste your time on them, or they just put in gibberish. I
did the same before I cancelled, and I still got a few emails from eHarmony afterward, telling me
that guys wanted to communicate with me. The fact that they don't take cancelled profiles out of
the selection pool is downright fraud, because it makes it seem like they're giving you more
matches.

The negative side of dating sites is dealing with the creeps and assholes who clearly have no idea
how to treat women like human beings.  But then again, I met my current sweetie through Craigslist,
so I'm not knocking it!

Ive dated my last four boyfriends, aside from my current one, after meeting them online. I felt like
talking to them online at first took some pressure off, and you actually kind of know some things
about them when you do meet. That means you might have more of an idea of what to talk about
without looking foolish for fishing around.
My boyfriend and I met on E-Harmony over a year ago. I think I dated every just about loser in the
Pacifc northwest but then I met him and I'm so happy.  The (very) extensive EH personality profile
helped me realize what traits are important to me and narrowed out a bunch that just wouldn't have
worked.  It got to the point that I could meet someone for a drink or whatever, spend 45 minutes
with him, throw down some cash for my share of the tab and wish him luck with his search, admitting
that I just wasn't feeling it.  It really helped me focus.  At first I felt like a loser but then I
came to accept that it just isn't as easy to meet people once you're out of college.  Anyway, I
really love this man and hope to spend my life with him.  It was completely worth the few hunny I
spent over my time on EH.  

Met my current girlfriend on Match. :) She's hot!

why is this on this site?

It broke up my three year relationship when my girlfriend cheated on me. I'm not a fan of them to
say the least.

I've used it off an on to varying degrees of success. I often wonder if there are some profiles put
on the sites by the sites themselves, so guys will think "man, I wanna meet this woman" and pay for
a subscription.

I am amazed by the people you think you'd have a lot in common with who turn you down ... but you
still see them there week after week after week. I am sure some guys use them as a catalog, while
some women use them so they will get e-mail from a guy.

If you have not met face-to-face after a half dozen e-mails, something is wrong.

There's something extra-insulting about being rejected by someone who's never met you in person
before.

I ran the gamut of online dating services and even tried a few introduction services during my late
twenties - early thirties.

Call me an elitist, but if I venture back into that realm, I'm going with It's Just Lunch or Table
for Six.  The women that I met through online dating were bottom of the barrel, financially
speaking - literally broke and living on the edge of homelessness just waiting to be rescued.

I only met one "successful professional" online (match.com and Yahoo 
Personals), and she turned out to be bipolar.  Met her on the up side, and found her lithium next
to the kitchen sink after she suddenly plummeted after a couple of manic weeks.

I'll turn 39 in a couple of weeks, and I haven't dated in four years.  I don't miss dating, and I'm
not bitter.  I've grown very comfortable in my single life, but I'd like a partner as time moves
forward.  I"m interested in someone near my own age who has also established her life on her own
terms, and I'd prefer an entrepreneur or someone ready to make that choice for the future.  I'll
spend some cash on It's Just Lunch to weed out the gals who can't quite figure out the truth behind
the term "educated professional."

Incidentally, you ought to expand your research to include private matchmakers.  You would not
belive how much they charge, and I'm a good lookin' guy who easily passed through screening
procedures.  Take a look at Jill Kelleher's service sometime.  They wanted over $10K, and they were
adamant about my need to make a baby with somebody NOW!
i got teh aids :(

My girlfriend was using a free online dating service & asked me to join as well. Her idea was to
double-date. 
I spent the time to fill out the profile information completely. When I searched, I only looked at
guys that also had taken the time to fill theirs out. One of the first guys I emailed lived about
10 miles away. He sent back an email that he had seen my profile & was planning on contacting me as
well. We were a 99% match for personality, etc, based on our profiles. There were lots of other guys
that contacted me, but I didn't feel compelled to actually meet any of them.
We emailed back & forth for a few weeks, and then I called him to set a date to meet FTF. We met at
a club where my friend was bartending. I had never been on a "blind" date before. I met the guy & we
played pool & talked for a few hours; he was very nice, but I didn't feel like lightning had struck
or anything, and it was all very platonic. We went to a Mariner's game the next week with his
friends, and then to a county fair the following week. After about a month of being just friends &
enjoying each other's company, we decided to try being romantically involved. Six weeks later, we
decided to get married. Neither of us had been married before, and it totally freaked our parents
out. Six weeks after that, we got married. We will be celebrating our 6th anniversary in January.
So, my experience would have to be... great! My husband is someone I would never have met
otherwise, & definitely not have dated. So, stepping out of my comfort zone paid off.  

I paid $50 and nobody would talk to me. Nobody. 

I'm not ugly. I'm not poor. I'm not abusive. I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do any drugs.
I'm even caffeine free! I'm not religious. I'm not intolerant. I'm not a vegan. You'd think
somebody would be interested. 

No, not at all. Online dating sucks. It's just a scam.

Myspace.com is free. And no lie, i haven't gotten this much sex in such a short time ever. The trick
is to add women that actually have commonality with you, ie favorite movies, heroes, etc. From there
a short funny message is in order and usually a tall sign on if she may be interested if she writes
back. Afterwards I write back with the simple question that tells me if she's worth the time...
"what's your story". And logically, if she writes back to this phrase, I know she's hooked on me
and/or my interest I her.
Veronica Mars is the best show ever.

I've been using on-line dating for 2 years and from my experience if you don't look like Brad Pitt
or Tom Cruise and make at least 50,000 a year you ain't gotta chance. If you just an average Joe
with the average job just do yourself a favor and meet the good ole fashion way.R u Daina that went to Silver Creek High School In San Jose, CA. 
I never did on line dating but I did go to a match making service.  The cost worked out to about
$60.00 per date--a prostitute would have been less expensive.  The big selling point was that the
women were so compatible that whenever I wanted sex, that they would want sex too.  One woman told
be that we would not be having sex on the first date and if that was all I was after then to date
someone else.  Many of the women said that they were more likely to be solicited for sex earlier in
the relationship from men from the service than from men they normally dated.  I met several women I
would have liked to have sex with but I didn't hook up with anyone.  Later I found out that some of
the women were being paid to go out on the dates although I don't know if any of the women I went
out with were paid.
it sucked

I'm 52, female, and have used online dating for 4 years. I found that the vast majority of men who
contacted me were looking to cheat on their wives. The single men are looking for someone to share
living expenses with. Many were non-citizens looking for a means to get a green card. I will
continue to use online dating services but take long breaks when it gets too frustrating.

i got herpes